– by Joe Markko
“Hello, Joe? This is Fred Caban.”
It was early in March, 2022, and I hadn’t heard from Fred for a dozen years. Not recognizing the incoming phone number, I screened the call. At 9pm, it was already past Grandpa’s bedtime. But it was good, and pleasant, to hear from him again. He was always a quick-witted, likeable soul.
He wanted me to write a book about his early, Christian Rock group, Agape. “I think it’s finally time,” he confided.
“Why me, Fred?”
“Because you’re a truth-teller. And you’re non-judgmental.”
Imploring him not to spread such rumors, my brain began to kick into high gear, immediately “counting the cost” of such a project.
Knowing only the smallest bits about Fred’s life and the Church experience of Agape, I wasn’t sure it was something I wanted to tackle. Too many “Rabbit holes.” But, after a few weeks of consideration, it felt like the right thing to do. Cautious to stay focused on the story of Agape’s music, I agreed.
Fred Caban and I have often had our histories linked by Jesus Music historians and students of the Jesus Movement. Widely recognized as two of the earliest pioneers of Christian Rock music in America, our names and those of our contributions, Agape and the All Saved Freak Band, seem bound together.
My only opportunity to meet him was over the span of a few days when we got together in Tucson under the auspices of our mutual friend, Richard Acevedo. We had about half a dozen songs to record and only a few days to do it. I was surprised to see Fred had taken the time to write out sheet music for all the songs, and had glued the edges together to create a large scroll, an admirable feat really, but had not actually learned any of the tunes.
It ended up being terrible timing for everyone. Overcome with the effects of a respiratory “bug” picked up along the way, I failed to deliver for the vocals. Fred thought I should be pressured to overcome and just work a little harder. Hmmm.
Musically, the trip was a failure, neither of us contributing anything that might be used. Perhaps, as with many musicians, Christian or not, there was some, low-grade tension between us. Perhaps I just disappointed him. We both disappointed Richard. We all got over it. “A friend loveth at all times.”
We also took the time to do some touristy things; visiting the ancient, Spanish Mission at San Xavier Del Bac near Tucson; walking among the graves at Boothill Cemetery, joking about the clever epithets; taking silly pictures on Mainstreet in Tombstone – foolishness and joy for kindred spirits.
We subsequently talked about working together on two, different occasions. But things always came down to the differences in our approach to music. Flexibility wasn’t always his strong suit and, with a small reputation among musicians for “not playing well with others,” a few referred to him as, “an acquired taste.” I loved him for who he was. That’s the only way any of us can be loved.
But, when it came to writing a book, Fred’s health issues caused me some concern. He was in rehab/recovery when he called, undergoing intensive Physical Therapy after years of being the primary caregiver for his dying wife, Anita. Bent over, unable to stand erect, our interviews over the next year would find him in other, similar locations.
Fred suffered greatly from diabetes, high blood pressure and other heart-related issues. Under a doctor’s care for wound management from those severe detriments, he was also in need of knee replacement surgery for both legs. No longer able to exercise, walk or drive – the crippling pain of bone-on-bone, grinding throughout his entire body, left him in serious need of serious pain meds, another serious issue to deal with.
Corresponding with the release of, “Genesis of a Genre: The Birth of Christian Rock,” Fred’s dearest friend, Lesa Caldarella-Wong, reported that Fred began making positive strides to improve his health, manage his pain and spend time with his children and grandchildren. A motorized scooter gave him more independence.
Able to live on his own again, Fred set up a small music studio in his apartment. Of course he did. Thomas Merton observed, “Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time.” Finally able to return to that precise, magical place in his soul, and feeling immensely hopeful with a new vision to create new music, Fred found a renewed joy and energy.
But he didn’t get to live out his vision. Looking forward to spending Christmas Eve and Christmas Day with his children and four grandchildren, Fred “slipped into the Mystic” on December 23, 2024. Surrounded by his books, guitars and musical equipment; newly focused on his family, faith and music, Fred Caban lay down his head and finalized his place in the history of Christian Rock.
Fred was a pioneer, visionary, musician, artist, seeker after Truth, Christian mystic and flawed creature. Lacking the capacity to arrive, he seemed always en route, always pursuing something just beyond his reach. A Spreader of Light, inspiring many thousands of people to embrace a closer, more intimate walk with God, Fred Caban remained a trusting believer in the Jesus of his youth until belief became reality.
He was an impactful and unique human being, another controversial figure in the history of Christian Rock. Like all true artists, his art and music will outlive him. In the final, two years of his life, Fred was buoyed by the notion that his music might influence the thinking of someone, somewhere, “until Shiloh comes.”
“Echoing through the ages,” is what he felt about his music. Such things were a wonder to him.
“The object isn’t to make art,” Robert Henri wrote, “it’s to be in that wonderful state which makes art inevitable.“ That’s the state of being in which Fred Caban sought to live his entire life, sometimes putting him at odds with those who loved him most. But that’s where Fred is now, “in that wonderful state,” forever creative, lost in the art of his soul. His newest, fresh start is just beginning.
“The alchemy starts to rise,
purifying my soul,
turning my lead into silver and gold.
My feet are on the ground,
my head’s in the clouds.
You’re turning my lead into silver and gold.”
– “Alchemy,” Fred Caban.
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